Pink Godzilla: Mario and Peach: The Real Story. Part 1

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Posted by: goban |

Mario and Peach: The Real Story. Part 1

Peach and Mario seem like the perfect videogame couple. The brave hero and the princess, fighting to keep the land safe from a villian who wants to take the princess for himself. However, scratch the surface of this E for Everyone rated facade, and the picture changes. Greed, lust for power, love triangles, interspecies romance, and murder are what you will find when you look behind the scenes of the most powerful relationship in all of gaming.

Today, in a PG Special Investigation, we will expose the true history behind the rise of Mario and Peach.

Our story begins in the Little Italy section of Brooklyn in the early 1980's with Mario, his brother Luigi, and his girlfriend Paulene. The Mario Brothers worked for the Metropolitan Sanitation Authority, keeping the Big City's water safe by battling giant crabs and mutant flies in the sewer. Every day after work, Paulene would cook a big, stereotypically Italian pasta dinner for the Brothers and they would all sit around the table telling stories and having a good time. This should have been where this tale ended, with Mario and Paulene getting married, having a bunch of kids, and living happily ever after. Unfortunately for them, fate would have other plans.

In 1981, the New York area was in the midst of a giant ape crisis. Large monkeys had been migrating across the river from Jersey and settling in to neigborhoods all throughout the city. These lonely gorillas would kidnap local girls and hide them in old factories and warehouses, forcing their boyfriends or husbands to run through bizarre obstacle courses to save them. This would hit home for Mario when he returned from work one day to find, instead of the usual plate of linguini, a dazed Luigi, who informed him that a large ape named Donkey Kong had broken into their apartment and captured Paulene.

Enraged, Mario tracked DK and Paulene to an abandoned construction site. Mario scaled the building, dodging DK's barrels and fireballs, and rescued his girlfriend. He then caged DK and prepared to turn him in to the authorities, but the monkey's son, DK Jr., freed his father from the plumber's clutches. Fearing that the Kongs would come after him and his family looking for revenge, Mario decided to move far away from Brooklyn, where DK wouldn't follow. Mario, Luigi, and Paulene headed towards the nearest Warp Pipe, ending up in a faraway land known as the Mushroom Kingdom

The Mushroom Kingdom was a quiet place, populated by a strange little race of fungus people known as the Toads. The Mario Brothers set up shop in a quiet corner of the kingdom, working on the country's many, many pipes. It was like the old days for the plumbers, business was good, the pasta flowed like water, and there was talk of Mario and Paulene getting married. However, this all came to a crashing halt when the Mushroom Kingdom was invaded by a ruthless group of reptiles.

Bowser Koopa, lord of the turtle tribe, was a beast looking for love. Tired of the swinging bachelor life, Bowser wanted to settle down with a nice girl who look past his many character flaws and see him for the sensitive, caring lizard king that he was. The Koopa King had a perfect wife in mind, Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom. She was rich, good looking, and had her own country - everything a megalomaniacal Koopa could ever possibly want. (Apparently Bowser wasn't going to let a little thing like a difference in species stand in the way of true love.)

Bowser began his courtship of the Princess the only way he knew how, with a full-scale military invasion of her country. Despite Bowser's clearly romantic intentions, Peach took his invasion the wrong way and rejected his advances. Undaunted, Bowser tried Plan B of The Reptile King's Guide to Romance. He captured the Princess and locked her in a dungeon until she changed her mind and agreed to marry him. Things looked bleak for the Mushroom Kingdom, but they had one last trump card: The Mario Brothers.

By now, everyone knows the story of Mario and Luigi's first fight against Bowser and the Koopa Army. The plumbers single handedly tore through the turtle tribe, defeated Bowser and rescued Princess Peach. The kingdom was saved, and the Mario Brothers were heroes. The plumbers prepared to go back home, where Paulene was certainly waiting with a big plate of victory pasta. Little did they know that their troubles were far from over.

Princess Peach was facing a dilemma. The Mushroom Kingdom had been greatly weakened by Bowser's assault. Without a stong defender like Mario, it would only be a matter of time before some other villians would try to take the kingdom for themselves. However, Mario and Paulene were engaged and the plumber would be far too busy with his family to constantly fight Peach's battles for her. She needed a way to keep Mario close to her and ready to fight at her beck and call.

Princess Peach decided that the only way to keep her kingdom secure was to take Mario for herself. If Mario was married to her, he would naturally do everything he could to protect her and her kingdom at all costs. There was only one problem with her plan; Mario wouldn't just leave Paulene. Peach had to find a way to get rid of Mario's troublesome fiancee.

Unfortunately for Paulene, the Princess knew just the one who could help her with her plan - Mario's oldest enemy, Donkey Kong.

Continue to Part 2. (Yes, after 8 long months there is finally a part 2.)

Comments

THE PLOT THICKENS! i cannot wait for the next installment!

Posted by: Atomic | March 6, 2007 11:55 PM

WOAH! That is cool!

Posted by: WOAH! | March 17, 2007 03:09 PM

This story RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Posted by: Nelly | May 28, 2007 06:06 AM

When is the 2nd one?! TELL ME!!

Posted by: Mary | July 24, 2007 04:34 PM

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SAVE PEACH BOWSER GET HER STAR MARIO IN HIS START

Posted by: Nicole Troyer | August 15, 2007 09:10 AM

OMG PRINCESS PEACH IS EEEEEVIL!
SHE IS GOING TO GET DONKEY KONG TO GET RID OF HER AND MAKE MARIO LOVE HER! PLUS MARRY HER! I WANT MORE WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT PLEASE TELL ME!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: omg | October 8, 2007 01:20 PM

Please tell me the next part!!!!!!!! I can't Wait!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Angela | October 22, 2007 12:52 AM

i cant wait for part 2 hurry up dont take so long

Posted by: katie | November 9, 2007 05:49 PM

Maybe Goban's waiting for Mario Galaxy to come out...

Don't keep us waiting any more!

Posted by: matsu | November 10, 2007 10:55 AM

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: CCC | January 28, 2008 03:31 PM

make mario fall deeply in love with peach! it's obvious mario and peach r a true couple!

Posted by: ashley | February 3, 2008 08:44 AM

hooooooooolllllllllyyyyyyyy cow!i wonder if they will ever have kids

Posted by: Abby potter | March 14, 2008 02:06 PM

i like it is so cool

Posted by: angela lynn soderberg | April 13, 2008 12:23 PM

i love this story

Posted by: Danielle | April 29, 2008 09:18 PM

vive mario et
peach et
luigi
o chiottttttttttttttttttt daisyyyyyy tes conneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
et peach est tro plus belle
ke toiiii daisy
en + dk est trop mocheeeeeeeeeeeeee meme sont frere est moche ta eu tore de partir avec dk et de laisser luigi tes tro nul moche et tu puuuuuuu du culllllllllllllllllll
et peach twa tu est trop belle
tu pu pa
et ta une plus belle robe
ke daisy la conne !!!!
et toi daisyyyyyy
tu peut meme pa faire denfan avce dk ke peach elle peut
la je tes casserrrr
vieille connassse
et o faite vive ossi brower
a par ke tu veu piquer peach a mario sa c pa bien et vive ton filssssssss
mini bowersssssss